This is a really hard post to write. It actually embarrasses me that I even have to write it. When I initially started this blog I was going to focus on budget friendly beauty and also a bit of my life as a single parent. Over time it has developed to mostly beauty and my weight loss journey. However, over the past few months I have barely posted about my weight because to be honest I have failed.
If you’ve been following my blog from the beginning you will remember that I used to do regular(ish) weigh ins. I have however not done it in a while. Honestly, I was and still am embarrassed.
Quite a few people have asked me for advice and congratulated me on how well I was doing but behind closed doors I have completely fallen off the wagon after my last weigh in.
Who or what is to blame you may ask, all I can say is that I can only blame myself. I have no excuse. I can’t blame my break up or stress or anything. I just ate, the food tasted good, the holidays were nice, I was just livin la vida loca. At the back of my mind I always kept thinking how I am disappointing so many people, my family, friends and even you guys.
I did try getting back on the wagon but I kept on failing. I just couldn’t stick to my diet. I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I still don’t know to be honest. I knew I couldn’t go on eating like it’s nothing, that I’m going to have to face the consequences.
Fast forward to now and my current weight is 162.2kgs. Yes guys, I picked up 5.8kgs. I am so disappointed in myself. All I can say is I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I have let myself down and also for disappointing you guys.
However…… It’s a new day and I have to learn to forgive myself. There’s an old chinese proverb that says Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up. I am choosing to get up. To not let my past fuck up determine my future. I will dust myself off and start again. Even if I fall 100 times I will stand up every single time. I will not be a failure.
Now that I have gotten that out of the way I can move forward. I WILL look back at my mistakes and learn from them. If you have read my previous blog post you will know that I have set a goal for myself to lose a minimum of 20kgs for this year. So I’m going to use my current weight as my starting point and update you guys on how much I have lost and how far I have to go to reach my goal.
I hope I don’t mess up again but if I do I will not give up.
So below you will find my current stats. Keep fingers crossed for me guys. This journey is no walk in the park.
Till Next Time
Hugs and Kisses
Goal Weight : 142.2kgs
Current Weight : 162.2kgs
Weight Lost : 0kgs
Weight to lose : 20kgs